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Nightmare Photographer game

G is off-line
26 October 2009 07:54
imageaware
Photographer
This member has been reset to pending
imageaware
Location
United Kingdom
Hertfordshire


Add your suggestions to create the 'perfect nightmare' of a Photographer.

Guy with camera-phone seeks compliant paying  models.

1) They will  pose as they are told , when they are told.

2) I will bring a 'Breast'  technician to instruct her on how her breasts should be attached to her chest and my people will of course need to meet with her arse prior to any photoshoot.


26 October 2009 08:05
laylarc
Model


"What do you mean references? From who? What other models, what have you heard? Who have you been speaking to? Are you saying I'm a pervert? Are you saying you're not going to be safe in a car with me, driving up to deepest, darkest Wales knowing only my first name? That's completely unprofessional and nobody will ever want to work with you again. OK you can have the landline, but if my wife answers, hang up straight away,"


Mr D is off-line
26 October 2009 11:36
Darkstudent
Photographer
Darkstudent
Location
United Kingdom
Lancashire
Manchester



"You need to do tfcd gonzo work with me to see if your facial expresions are good enough for paied glamour work"


eeee aaaa is off-line
26 October 2009 11:36
xentrix
Photographer
xentrix
Location
Australasia
New Zealand
adada

booooring.


HazelC is off-line
26 October 2009 14:21
Izzlebums
Model
Izzlebums
Location
United Kingdom
Cambridgeshire
Peterborough

"I have just found out I am in your area tomorrow, which is so unlikely as I was booked with Jodie Marsh all week (she's a personal friend you see, I do all her work), I have a great camera phone and I am going to bring my wife. She is a bi-sexual and really keen to improve her portfolio so I thought you could help her. We are going to have a live web cam feed as well - not for anyone else but for yourself - so you can get loads of publicity. I feel that soft girl on girl is a waste of time, and won't help your portfolio - so maybe we go real hard stuff. Oh, and it's in a hotel room that ok?"
I have some dates available for Art-Nude work, I can travel to you!


gerryquiff is off-lineSilver Member
26 October 2009 17:56
gerryquiff
Photographer
gerryquiff
Location
United Kingdom
Lanarkshire
Bonnie Scotland

Yes it's a great location. I've made the flat, EH STUDIO look like a disgusting hovel.
I've got fake dog poo, lying about on the floor, just like they use in the movies, and to complete the effect I pipe in a disgusting smell. It really gives the impression the studio is disgusting.
Oh and remember Brookside had a whole street they filmed in, well I've done the same, we'll be shooting in a studio that's been built to look like a run down estate.
CAT WANTED. Must be large enough to make Davy Crockett hat. (6 7/8) Prefer ginger


27 October 2009 08:23
laylarc
Model


"Right, walk up and down the hall with these bright red heels on. Again. Again. Again. Oh you've got a mark on the sole, let me just get rid of that (with my tongue) Foot fetish? Me? Noooooooooo!


KT101 is off-line
27 October 2009 08:31
kt101
Photographer
kt101
Location
United Kingdom
Hertfordshire
Borehamwood

Right. I'm paying for this shoot. If I want you to hold your stomach in you will do it.
I don't care if you are pregnant. I want a flat stomach!
What do I know about photography..... I'm a mechanic/milkman/driver/dogsbody. etc. etc. etc.


27 October 2009 11:17
laylarc
Model


Joking aside, my idea of a nightmare shoot is a terrified looking chap holding his camera as if it's a grenade that might go off, and saying in a tiny voice:

"Oh just do anything, I don't really mind,"

That's why I started teaching newbies how to work with models!


HazelC is off-line
27 October 2009 12:09
Izzlebums
Model
Izzlebums
Location
United Kingdom
Cambridgeshire
Peterborough

Quote from laylarc
Joking aside, my idea of a nightmare shoot is a terrified looking chap holding his camera as if it's a grenade that might go off, and saying in a tiny voice: "Oh just do anything, I don't really mind," That's why I started teaching newbies how to work with models!




Had that before - poor guy was petrified! x
I have some dates available for Art-Nude work, I can travel to you!



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