I'd bin the out of focus photos: Walking Shot, Hand on Face plus Lying Down Side Shot... out of focus and kit in the images...
I trust the full images you received from the shoot are edited and a higher quality than the web versions you've posted here?
look around port's of other models, see what they are doing right: expressions, poses... practice those and try and book some more shoots: paid, part-paid, TFP it's up to you.. with a photographer who's work you like and who creates a look you want... not just anyone who offers to shoot you..
I quite like the three quarter shot, though the hat looks a bit distracting.. and your main profile image has something about it...
I can split your portfolio in two clear parts, those images that tell me you have a good look and can work to a camera, and the rest which do not really say anything, (of which some are technically poor - out of focus). Remove the not so good and your port will be immediately much improved. My keepers are numbers 1,3 5 & 9 based on the order in which they appear right now.
My other main suggestion is that you pay attention to the styling, the choice of clothes - and particularly when in combination with your ink. Think about the overall look - it adds to the impression the image gives.
I'd work with you. I think your images show potential, but you need to be more selective in the ones you post. If you're ever planning to Scotland let me know and we could shoot in some outstanding locations near me. Hope all goes well.
Agree with Katie and Rob - I would be more than happy to work with you.
You do need to be more selective on whats posted, but we all learn over time as we develop and grow, but it's a good start and certainly i think you will grow that portfolio in the coming months/years. Keep on.